Crashie Rebrand (A Deal)

Posted on April 01, 2018 by TheRandomMelon

We’re rebranding to Crashie today.

My speech to you

My fellow patrons. As your leader and commander in chief, it is with a heavy heart that I’m informing you that we have made a strategic decision to merge with the Tokyo invaders known as the Crashie. Right now this is the best chance of survival as Staff and as Volunteers. This has been the hardest decision of my life, and I did not do so lightly. As Staff, and indeed as human citizens, we have never willingly merged with a brand like this. At this very idea is anathema to our core values and everything that we hold dear, yet the fact and hard truth remains that we lost this battle for now, and believe we will fight another day. We shall return. God bless you, and god bless Melonz, now Crashie.

if you couldn’t tell this is April Fools mate

I don’t want to sell.